Monday, March 18, 2013

What You Don't Know......

.......Won't Hurt You.

It is a peaceful Monday afternoon on the most arid state in the Commonwealth.

Adolf is recovering from the intense commercial activity of Saturday and Sunday, having watered his front lawn which is the sole oasis of green in an otherwise desolate desert called a street.  Now settled with a cigar and a lovely drop of red the cool vespers are being enjoyed.

Suddenly there is a commotion out the back.

The Cook has been sitting for the last hour or so on one of those exquisite white plastic moulded chairs, reading a book.

"Jeesus!  I just turned the chair over to brush off the cobwebs and there was a bloody red back spider."


Adolf, ever the solicitous and dutiful husband, inquired - "Did it bite you on the arse ---------- Dear?

The reply was not for tender ears.

Isn't it funny how Australians have such a phobia about spiders and snakes?

They are more scared of you than you are of them.   If you just leave the poor little buggers alone they will not harm you.


KG said...

I think you'll find that away from the neurotic softies in the suburbs, Australians mostly have no such phobia.
Out West here, Tiger and Brown snakes are common enough but locals still go barefoot at night and in our town almost nobody bothers to catch or kill snakes.

paul scott said...

You can sit there contented brother, but soon i will be in KeriKeri and you can expect sudden danger

pdm said...

I seem to recall a song from years past about a `red back on the toilet seat'. One of Slim Dusty's perhaps.

Adolf Fiinkensein said...

Paul Scott, you'll struggle to find me in Kerikeri.


I vividly remember a sheep farmer some three hundred miles from Perth chasing a snake across a paddock in his ute. He ran it over and then killed it with a spade. The poor bloody snake was just getting on with its business but it had to be killed, apparently.

the conservative said...

I went drift fishing once in Keri Keri, lots of snapper, but no spiders.