Well Sheeple from tomorrow you will all get up one hour earlier.
Why, because we, your benevolent rulers say so, you are too stupid to make such a decision yourself.
Even you dolts who are already up before dawn will rise one hour earlier so you wont cause any logistical problems.
As for the idle buggers who normally stay in bed till lunch time we will not interfere with your wants as by lunch time it is of little import.
We your munificent rulers can not allow you to decide to get up early so as to have a little more time at days end, dont be so inanely stupid, one size fits all better for the masses, OK.
So when all you sheeple who can't make such momentous decisions for yourselves move your clocks forward an hour before you go to bed tonight and if necessary you may retire one hour earlier if you must as it would be far too difficult to control that,
BUT YOU WILL GET UP ONE HOUR EARLIER TOMORROW.
March 1st, Whaleoil will no longer be number one
19 minutes ago