Monday, April 11, 2011

Would Jesus Make The Cut?

Adolf is job searching. Nothing too strenuous, mind. Three or four days per week, preferably of my own choosing.

Suddenly there it was. Just the right headline for a grumpy older agribusiness exponent.

So I read on and on and on and sent off an application. Here it is.

Dear Sir/Madame/It

I reacted enthusiastically to the sight of your advertisement's headline on 'Seek.'

"Manager - Agribusiness Banking"

What an excellent headline.

However, as I read on and on and ooooooon I grew tired such was the length, eloquence and prescriptiveness of the job description. Hell, if you people were Presbyterians, Jesus Christ himself wouldn't have made the cut for an interview.

To assist you in future I have redrafted your advert, for which service on this occasion I will not require a fee.

"Manager - Agribusiness Banking"

A reputable banking institution requires an experienced rural account manager who can effectively and profitably bring to a close non performing delinquent farm loan files.

To apply, press button "A" and attach your CV.

There you are! It's easy if you just try.

Oh by the way. If you seriously want to interest me in a two year contract it might be an idea to give some indication of the remuneration attached to said contract.

Best wishes


1 comment:

pdm said...

Hell they must have learned from the UK recruitment people. What a bunch of wankers they are.