Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Herald Panders

After just five minutes Adolf can't help notice The Herald's new strategy to save its circulation.

Pander to wankers.

First, it gives headlines to some petrol head wanker called 'Chudleigh' (I say, Chudleigh old chap) who was nabbed doing 75 k in a 50k zone. He's whinging about the cop not letting him know he was there, for God's sake. (Dumb bloody editor doesn't even know 'power pole' is two words.)

Chudleigh Haggett, of Tauranga, was driving to Taupo for the long weekend with his family when he was stopped by the officer, who appeared on the street from behind a powerpole, he said.

The family were travelling to a motor racing event and were going through the small town of Reporoa - just south of Rotorua - at around 9am on Saturday.

Mr Haggett said he had gone through a 50km/h sign and immediately adjusted his speed as he approached a group of shops.

Why don't you face facts, Herald? The prick was caught speeding through a small country town.

Second we have the childish headline "Goff Clinches Gillard Talks Before Key" as though this is some major victory.

Yesterday Mr Key said he was not concerned about Mr Goff's visit. But he indicated Mr Goff broke with protocol by keeping it under wraps until the last minute.

He said that when he was Leader of the Opposition he had always advised the Prime Minister in advance in writing when he was meeting other leaders. Mr Goff had notified him only on Sunday, by phone.

This is the guy who wants New Zealanders to trust him with the country's economic levers yet he can't be trusted even to display normal courtesy and good manners. Can you imagine the screeching from the Bilious Bitch if Dr Brash had done such a thing?

Anyway, what the hell did they talk about? Will she be giving Goff lessons in wasting vast amounts of taxpayer's money on shonky building contracts and death inducing insulation schemes? Will Goff be extolling the virtues of being the longest serving 'political unknown' in the nation's history?

When Mr Key sees her in a few days time, no doubt he will let her know in clear language what New Zealanders think of invading Australian unionists.

I wonder how The Herald will spin that?

And then there is the gratuitous and false story about Fonterra CEO's pay package. The slack arsed propagandists at The herald would have you think Mr Ferrier will be paid $5.1 million but what they don't tell you is that will ONLY happen if he meets ALL his financial and operational targets for the year. Note the carefully misleading wording 'in a range'.

The dairy farmer co-operative's 2010 annual report yesterday showed Ferrier's pay for the year ended July 31 was in a range with an upper limit of $5.11 million, compared to $3.63 million the previous year.

One thing you can rely on these days. The herald will deliver populist, unbalanced, selective coverage. Guaranteed


Anonymous said...

Only £2,400,00 for the head of the largest dairy exporter in the world?

yep, this is disgusting. It's far, far below what the international market would demand for such a job.

Anonymous said...

My girlfriend signed up to a monthly trial of the Herald and it is awesome. Burns well and catches paint drips in an excellent fashion. I didn't realise there was news in there though - couldn't see any for all of the fucking ads. As for Chudleigh...I can totally see where he's coming from...growing up with a name like that was bound to make him a dickhead. Poor chap.

Tinman said...

Perhaps you should add the section wrongly labelled "Drinking Debate" where they publish only townie anti-fun propaganda with no debate at all to your list.

As one of only two genuine news organisations in NZ (the others are very limited) I read the Herald online daily but it's usually a bloody short read.

Anonymous said...

When Ferrier found prices sliding he had no brilliant answer that I can see but now that they are on the up he gets paid more for doing nothing to create it. Good luck to him but it seems that management is often a passenger paid to be on board.

WAKE UP said...

This has gotta be fiction - nobody can possibly be named Chudleigh Haggett.

Adolf Fiinkensein said...

Wake Up, can you imagine the poor bastard going through puberty?

Anonymous said...

Ferrier gets almost as much as rooter Wayne Rooney - shucks