Thursday, July 22, 2010

Bluff and Double Bluff

The other day I watched a documentary on the Six Day War in which Israel, with a disadvantage of perhaps ten to one, comprehensively defeated Egypt, Syria and Jordan and their numerous Arab state supporters.

Israel's victory was achieved by use of meticulous planning, unorthodox strategy, rigorous training, superior intelligence, innovative technology, determination, impeccable execution and above all, split second timing and complete surprise.

Adolf speculates on a possible repeat performance during coming months.

Unorthodox strategy

I was fascinated to see the Israelis had carefully traced transportable' routes through the supposedly impenetrable desert terrain. The enemy did not expect an attack because 'everybody knew' you could not drive tanks and vehicles through there. Today' everybody knows' Israel can't overfly Iran because to do so would need the use of other countries' airspace.

Superior Intelligence

The Israelis had a master spy operating at a very high level in Damascus. They knew everything they needed to know about the defenses of the Golan Heights. By other means they knew everything they needed about the daily habits of the Egyptian Air Force. One wonders what sources they might have today in Iran?

Innovative Technology

Egypt had modern state of the art powerful Russian tanks. Israel took hundreds of American war surplus Sherman tanks and modified them to produce large numbers of a superior weapon for the local conditions. The Egyptians were out gunned initially and then finished off by the Israeli air force when their generals panicked and retreated. The Uzi sub machine gun was thought to be decisive against the long and clumsy AK47 in close quarter combat on the Golan Heights.

Timing and Surprise

Egypt's air force and army were knocked out before Syria and Jordan had time to scratch their respective arses, let alone react, thereby allowing Israel to bring concentrated force to bear on the Golan Heights and defeat Syria.

Rigorous Training

The best one liner in the documentary summed it up.

"Israel trained for war while Egypt trained for street parades in Cairo."

So what does it all mean for today? What might happen if these same qualities, characteristics and political pressures are applied today? Here's a bit of idle Adolfian speculation. Lets call it:

AfterDinnerJacket - To The Cleaners

In February 2011, tiring of constant Iranian sponsored mayhem in its streets, Iraq moves its best troops and armour to the Iranian border. In the face of the now imminent arrival of an Iranian nuclear arsenal and increasingly bellicose statements from Iran, the Kenyan Jackass plans a visit to Tel Aviv, Tehran and Baghdad, during which he will personally save the Middle East from itself.

In Tel Aviv, Israel tells Obama what he wants to hear and what they want Iran to hear and sends him off to Tehran. On the second day of Obama's visit to Tehran, Iraqi troops cross the Iranian border in large numbers, allegedly chasing insurgents. While the world holds it's breath, and Iran is looking the other way, Israel launches an air strike via Saudi airspace which smashes the Iranian early warning system and delivers tactical nuclear weapons to each of the potential Iranian nuclear weapons delivery sites. Saudi Arabia, Jordan, Iraq and a few other Arab states heave quiet sighs of relief.

Iran panics and seizes the Kenyan buffoon, holding him hostage and demanding the US withdraw all it's naval forces from the region. The Pres is unable to speak on account of his teleprompter got damaged in the scuffle.

The US Vice President has a heart attack during an emergency joint session of Congress which resolves to send Red Cross parcels. Meanwhile, US carrier borne forces clean out the Revolutionary Guards and the US navy promptly sinks Iran's small submarine fleet.

Iraqi troops push on to Tehran and install an interim government.

Diplomatic sources indicate to the interim government that the US does not want the Pres back as while he's been away the economy has improved and small businesses have started to employ people again. Anyway, new information reveals he is an illegal alien and he is sent off to Kenya, where he belongs, saving all the time money and energy associated with impeachment.

9 comments:

Murray said...

You missed one key element, the one that Israel always counts on.

They were fighting arabs.

Anonymous said...

Israel launches an air strike via Saudi airspace which smashes the Iranian early warning system and delivers tactical nuclear weapons to each of the potential Iranian nuclear weapons delivery sites.

And then Pakistan hits Tel Aviv.

Oops.

There already is an Islamic Bomb.

That's why the only solution here is a strategic one. One Ohio broadside at Iran - countervalue as well as counterforce. Another for Iran. And another split between Pakistan and Afganistan.

Anonymous said...

heh how about this theory - Israel discovers a gay Iranian rocket scientist and blackmails him to put a small explosive device in the top of every Iranian nuclear weapon which can be detonated remotely.

When the mad mullahs finally hit the big red button and all their nuke weapons explode on launch the mullahs get pissed off, round up all the nuke scientists and shoot them for incompetency.

Thats what I call finesse

Jimmie

Anonymous said...

If someone nukes anyone it will go tits-up big time for all of us and my dispensationalist mates will have to concede they were wrong. That will be a great day in itself.
Israel isn't the complete answer and their recent stalemate in Lebanon shows they are not as flash as they like to think they are.
At the end of the day you can't win a spiritual war by having a bigger stick. The Big Guy's stick is what matters and neither of them are holding it.

Psycho Milt said...

Egypt's air force and army were knocked out before Syria and Jordan had time to scratch their respective arses...

Which is the advantage of a mass surprise attack. Once the enemy air force has been destroyed on the ground, your own ground forces are going to have an easy time of it, even if outnumbered - particularly in an environment lacking in vegetation. Forget all the other blather about Israeli genius and superior technology - the surprise attack on the Arab air forces was the guarantee of victory.

Anonymous said...

f someone nukes anyone it will go tits-up big time for all of us

well nothing less that a nuke will take our the Iraqi WMD factories - and even then, we might miss one.

which is why a counter-value strike must accompany any counter-force action.

Adolf Fiinkensein said...

Quite right, Milt. The simplicity of how it was done was amazing. They Ayrabs were nearly as dumb as the Yanks at Pearl Harbour.

Psycho Milt said...

Or the Poles in Fall Weiss - great company the Israelis were keeping...

kevin said...

and the 'kenyan wonder' escapes using a burka as a disguise and gets involved in a (male) burka bomber squad by default...