Monday, August 24, 2009

The Unelectable Leading the Inconsolable

The inconsolable left who have lost battle for Auckland City and the plot have found themselves a self appointed cheer leader in the unelectable Mayor of North Shore City whose latest antics make Jubilation T Cornpone look like a conquering hero. (You have to scroll down the link a short way to read about JTC) Oh, all right then, here it is.

"....the Confederate General Jubilation T. Cornpone was, by virtue of his incompetence, so instrumental in the defeat of his own army as to be a hero of the Republic."

The Moron Mayor has issued a SECOND press release lauding the virtues of taking the airs along the beaches of the North Shore. Not for this brave medical marvel the dire warning of public health professionals. Not for him the grim news that a young girl this morning is desperately ill after imbibing some of his toxic sea water.

North Shore City staff and executives must be red faced as they contemplate this sensible notice on their website and then read the following piece of crap masquerading as, of all things, a press release.

21 August 2009

Mayor and Rimu back on the North Shore beaches

The Mayor of North Shore City, Andrew Williams, has made the most of a short break during today’s glorious spring weather to take his beloved 15 year old golden retriever Rimu for another beach walk on the North Shore.

“It was such a gorgeous afternoon here in the “Sporting Capital of New Zealand” that I couldn’t resist taking Rimu for a brisk walk from Campbells Bay to Mairangi Bay. And it’s a great way for me as Mayor to catch up with many locals in the community who were also out today enjoying the beaches of the East Coast Bays.”

“However, as I caution everyone, I kept Rimu on the leash, under good control at all times, and we kept well away from any seaweed or anything washed up on the beach” says Mayor Williams. “The sand was in fabulous condition, with the tide out, and the coast was looking just stunning.”

“My advice to people continues to be, obviously be more cautious than usual and keep a tight rein on your dog. Don’t let them get anywhere near seaweed or any washed up objects that could be potentially harmful. It boils down to simple common sense. The toxins have been found in washed up sea slugs and other marine life. Just make sure that your pet does not sniff out and chew on anything.” says Mayor Williams. “But if you have a dog that simply cannot resist fossicking, then it would be advisable to keep them away from the beaches meanwhile. as is also the case for obvious reasons with young children.”

Rimu loved his hour long walk, and the Mayoress and I will be out walking him on our fabulous East Coast Beaches over this weekend. Hopefully the weather will stay as good as it was today, as I need the exercise having broken my leg a few months ago.” says Mayor Williams.


Whaeloil is right. It's time for the Mayor to resign or to be arrested for his own protection before he's shot.


Anonymous said...

You ahve got to be kidding.Surely this press release is an invention. You cannot tell me a leading mayor would put this out as a press release. It’s sanctimonious narcissistic drivel if it’s true.

Hamish Collins said...

How can a Mayor contradict the advice his own council gives on their own website?

Just unbelievable...