Friday, June 26, 2009

Microsoft. Wankers.

Sigh.
The ongoing computer saga.
New laptop is 6 days old.
I was nervous about Vista, we have all heard and seen the horror stories. The laptop has been working briliantly and I was beginning to relax, downloaded open office, installed myob and made it work. Itunes is going great.
But then I did something that everybody advises against.
I succumbed to the automatic update prompt. 483 megabytes of download later. I have no sound. It is telling me that all my device drivers are upto date, but still no sound.
Windows update should be called; "We are going to snap it off in your ass".
Bill Gates you suck, so does your mate Paul Allen. A plague on all your houses.
And HP can suck my hairy arse as well.
I have tried to find a phone number to call, but we all know how that will end. Some pubescent Indian will but-but down the phone and I will smash the computer into a pile of plastic.
I could take it down to Noel Leemings but all I will get from them is the phone number. And again, I do not want to lose half a year on hold after dialling 0800 WEDONTGIVEAFUCK
ANy ideas?

22 comments:

Redbaiter said...

It will either be drivers or sound setting Bill. Nothing big deal. Fixable in five minutes if you know what you are doing.

You can also roll back drivers if a newly installed one fails to work.

Plenty of stuff on the net as to how to do it.

If there's nothing wrong with your sound settings, try a search for "roll back drivers vista"

I downgraded all my computers with Vista back to XP.

Vista is just another step in Microsoft's degeneration.

Seven seems to be a bit of an improvement.

Ollo Chubb said...

Yep I was helping a friend setup speakers on her HP Vista laptop - what a joke it was configuring the software then routing the sound back through the onboard speakers afterwards. Another friend had sound issues with his HP/Vista laptop as well - sounds a lot like what you have. I suggest a system restore.
Hang in there until Windows 7 is released (October I think), then purchase an upgrade.
Or install Unbuntu.

peteremcc said...

It's a well known issue with HP laptops.

Vista's drivers are fine, HP tried to force you to use their special ones.

Their software that does the forcing sucks and often screws up the drivers.

Go into Device Manager and uninstall your sound card and then do a refresh in Device Manager and it will find it and install the default Vista drivers again.

erikter said...

Sorry to say it but serves you right for installing the crappy/underperforming Vista.

The sooner you go back to XP the better.

Barnsley Bill said...

I did not install it, it came preloaded. Peter MCC. Nice one. We have sound again. Uninstalled and reinstalled the sound bits. Can now hear again.
You may have a point bagging HP, but it worked perfectly until I succumbed to the bombardment of screams from Microscum to run automatic update and it sucked nearly half a gig through my interweb connection. Thankfully the 10 gig limit should be safe this month. fairfacts is away.

peteremcc said...

Microsoft tell manufacturers how their operating system (including updates) work.

It's not MS's fault if the manufacturer ignores the rules MS set.

Don't get me wrong, Vista isn't perfect, and i'm not an MS fanboy.

But MS get blamed every time something goes wrong on a PC, where as normally its someone else's fault.

;)

Redbaiter said...

I would never buy aother HP product. Last HP unit I brought was a wireless printer.

Complex to set up and install. Constantly uninstalling itself and needing to be re-installed. Disconnecting from the network.

Huge driver package.

Bought a Brother wireless next, and everything worked like a charm.

No comparison to the HP.

IMHO HP as a company is too much like Microsoft now. Top heavy with wooden headed fuckwits.

You only have to see this video of Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer (obviously a complete idiot) to know there's only one way to go for them, and that's down-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvsboPUjrGc

Pique Oil said...

Barnsley, I have had Vista for some time now and it is a pain but I will live with it. Motels with older wireless and Lan connections are a nuisance as well. Vista gets the blame but the problem is support for IPv6. I disabled that and everything is fine again.
My wifes HP had the same issue with sound but it was easily fixed as Peteremcc suggested.

Whaleoil said...

1. I told you to buy an Apple
2. I told you not to touch Vista
3. Install Ubuntu
4. Stop crying

PM of NZ said...

Aah, just what I like. The technologically challenged still exist in droves.

And keep the likes of me gainfully employed.

Anonymous said...

the IT industry has always amused me coming as i do from the motor industry I mean you buy a system but no they then tell you you need a whole bunch of other stuff thyt was never mentioned.

Like you go into a car show room and buy the car in pieces

"But you didnt tell us you wanted wheels with that sir."

"You didnt ask for brakes on that model"

the IT inudstry is its own worst enemy. Unable to anticipate the customer and deliver a whole package at a one up price.

useless

gd

Bok said...

I still dont get people buying PC's

My Macbook Pro was expensive, about $6k. So you can imagine my shock when a year after the warrantee ran out, it died. Took it to Apple and they had it fixed and back to me for free within 36 hours with all the new updates as well. And unlike PC's it is actually useful.

(And how is this for underlining the point that Mac users are smarter.. the word verification came up as ..mesavi

KG said...

Any ideas? Yup.

Buy a bloody Mac!

Anonymous said...

As above; by a Mac!

Only a fool buys a PC!

Anonymous said...

Sigh.
The ongoing capitalism saga.
New US residency is 6 days old.
I was nervous about LA, we have all heard and seen the horror stories. The insurance has been working briliantly and I was beginning to relax, changed some policy options, paid by credit card, installed myob and made it work. The TV is going great.
But then I did something that everybody advises against.
I succumbed to an updated coverage plan. $483 later, according to the website I have no dental coverage. It is telling me that all my insurance policies are upto date, but still no coverage.
Aetna policy update should be called; "We are going to snap it off in your ass".
Ron Williams you suck, so does your mate Mark Bertolini. A plague on all your houses.
And Blue Cross can suck my hairy arse as well.
I have tried to find a phone number to call, but we all know how that will end. Some pubescent Indian will but-but down the phone and I will smash the computer into a pile of plastic.
I could go down to AmeriHealth but all I will get from them is the phone number. And again, I do not want to lose half a year on hold after dialling 0800 WEDONTGIVEAFUCK
ANy ideas?



Yeah. Stop complaining about capitalism you fuck.


And all those groupies saying "Buy a Mac" - it's just like saying "Go and Live in Moscow".


PCs stand for freedom, for choice, for capitalism. If you want help configuring it, you can choose to pay for it, or not.


Or you can move to the centrally controlled, cult-of-personality, communist "users republic" of Apple under the Great Leader Steve Job (is he alive or is he dead? who knows??)

KG said...

"Or you can move to the centrally controlled, cult-of-personality, communist "users republic" of Apple.."

You poor ignorant fucking lemming..a whole lot of us don't give a shit about Steve Job, about cults of whatever and about ignorant shits who prefer to continue paying for a defective product. We just want something that does what we paid for, day in, day out without problems, without having to buy a whole raft of extra rip-off shit before the fucking product will work as advertised.
We have better things to do than fiddle around under the hood of the nice shiny new car before the goddam thing will run properly. And we certainly don't need to cross our fingers and hope before downloading updates.If that makes me a 'groupie' then I plead guilty--while I get on and use something that just works.
You carry on with your Bill Gates asslicking, sucker. So he can give away the money he ripped off you to fund his third-world aid wanks.:-)

Andrew said...

Install Windows 7. Even in beta it kicks Vista's ass. Much faster as well.

MacDoctor said...

The MacDoctor smiles pityingly over the top of his MacBook Pro and goes back to typing...

Dave Mann said...

In Windows XP this would work. The labels might be slightly different, but the principles are the same. You will be restoring your computer to the pre-update settings:

-left click on the 'start' menu
-left click on 'run'
-enter 'msconfig' in the dialogue box
-left click on 'system restore'
- left click on the option 'restore computer to a previous time' or something similar
- chose the restore point immediately before you updated
- restore this or a previous day if the exact day isn't shown
-bingo, voila, ooh-la-la, yay babyyyy, yikes, wow

Let me know if this worked. Good luck.

Dave Mann said...

Well... obviously it was no help then...

Barnsley Bill said...

No, it was a big help :)
Computer is working well now. However the task of reloading 500 compact discs has got the better of me. I have an old library in itunes on my desktop which is running XP. How do I transfer from one pc to my new laptop. Or is there a way to get an ipod to reverse sync? ie, can I get my ipod to upload to a new laptop so that my entire library is installed in one go?

peteremcc said...

No reverse syncing without complicated add on programs.

Best bet is to copy all the files over (use an external hard drive or similar).

Then you can copy over the "iTunes" folder inside "My Music" and that folder has all the database for iTunes in it.

If the directory that the music is stored in has changed, you need to edit the database to tell it the new location, but if the directory is exactly the same (ie still inside the same folder in My Music, and your username is the same on the two computers) then it should just work.

NB: Your iPod can be used as an external hard drive if you have one of the large capacity ones. If there isn't enough room on it, just wipe the music and then add it back on again when you're all set up on the new computer.