Friday, June 26, 2009

Fuck Michael Jackson - Steven Wells is Dead

OK, maybe you never read the NME back in the 80s and 90s. Maybe you don't read the Guardian's sport column. You poor, sad fuck. One of the great writers and journalists of our age is dead - Steven Wells, dead of lymphatic cancer at age 49. (As a 47-year-old, I find that bit particularly depressing.)

Read the piece in the Guardian and laugh. The one about refs had me in fits. And whatever you do, don't miss this tour-de-force in the face of imminent death. A sample:

And when the fluid drains out of your scrotal sac, guess where it goes next? Can you?

That's right, for about a week I sport a huge, fluid-filled fringe under the head of my penis, making it look like some weird skinhead Gila-lizard from hell. I tell every male I meet about this.

They are all, without exception, appalled. One says:

"Cancer victim or not, if you don't shut the fuck up right now, I'm going to punch you."


Psycho Milt said...

To the syphillitic arse-felcher who rated this post a 1: unlike Swells, no-one will regret your death, you louse-parasite, and I'm not leaving your arse-wipings on my post. Anyone that rates this post low prompts a counter-rating from me. If you don't like it, fuck off.

Budgieboy said...

Hey PM, any chance of checking the links?

Sounds like a good read but I cant get to links to work.

Can you help?

Thanks in advance.

Psycho Milt said...

Aaagh! Sorry - fixed now. Maybe louse-parasite was rating my post down for sheer incompetence.

Budgieboy said...

I doubt it Milt... only a 'louse-parasite' would give a rank rating for a simple error like that.

Dollars to doughnuts he (or she) is a socialist...

THAT... was a joke!

Good yarn, thanks for sharing.

P.S. Milt you are seeming so… how do I say this… ‘Ok’ lately… as an acknowledgement for greatly improved blogging could I shout you an ACT party membership?

Barnsley Bill said...

Great post Milt, I regularly read Wells. As a young music fan and latterly as a fat ex sport participant.