Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Cricket Update

In the latest test match between Hamas and israel, being played on the Gaza strip, a sticky wicket at the best of times, Hamas opened the bowling with a slow but steady rocket attack.

The Israeli opening batsmen have knocked up over 530 runs for the loss of no wickets and the umpires are attempting to force a declaration. Meanwhile, Hamas have set a world record by becoming the first fielding side to unsuccessfully appeal against the light.

The Israeli skipper is reported to have observed that there is little substance or consistency to the Hamas bowling and their batting lineup is pretty suspect. He says 'there are many more runs to be made here. Of course this is fantastic batting practice for us as we prepare for the real test when Iran dares to step onto the field of play. We are looking for a series whitewash.'


Whaleoil said...

Top stuff that man

Anonymous said...

The french and egyptian umpires are in the pay of the losing team.

The West used area bombing to force Germany and Japan into submission - into unconditional surrender

Israel should keep on escalating the bombing, following the models of the RAF and USAF,
until Gaza and the West Bank similarly surrender unconditionally -

at which point all their leaders can be executed for war-crimes, and any remaining population resettled or removed (that's what unconditional surrender means)


I see the Hamas team keep smuggling kit but the media turns a blind eye.

thedavincimode said...

Very good Adolf.

You ommitted the ineffectiveness of the third umpire because of chronic fauxtography in the replays.

Adolf Fiinkensein said...

Quite so davinci.

With a little more thought I might have raised also the paucity of quality commentary.

thedavincimode said...

... and in my spelling