What a busy bunch of followers Islam has!!

First, there was the Mumbai attacks, killing several hundred.
Now, we have hundreds more killings by muslims in Nigeria.
Islam truly is a Religion of Peace, eh!
When will we wake up to the threat to us all from this evil 7th century Death Cult?

Gordon Brown faces yet another Downfall!!!

Just what is it with 'Downfall'? It has been adapted to poke fun of the politics of the US, Britain, and New Zealand. What about Australia? I am sure Kevin Rudd would make a lovely Adolf! It's those glasses, you see.

Anyway, Iain Dale has posted a new version of Downfall to account for the deepening economic crisis facing Britain and Gordon Brown's tax raising mini-budget.

If that has whetted your appetite for more of the Scottish Fuhrer, here's the other downfall he faced a few months back, when he was 20% or so behind in the polls, which seems to be where he is heading now.

There seem to be others too, such as a movie trailer, which I am sure would be well worth a reworking to feature the dying days of Helen Elizabeth Clark!

Why am I posting so much UK politics at the moment? Is it because I am heading back there? Or is it because there seems to be stuff all happening in New Zealand at the moment.

Just what sort of a country am I returning to!!???

The dangers of Christmas!!!

Newspaper columists like the Daily Mail's Richard Littlejohn have given acres of space to the shambolic suppression of Christmas on grounds of 'Elf and Safety.'

Apparantly it is unsafe to have decorations in woprkplaces, and you can forget about climbing up some steps to put a star or angel on a Christmas tree, which is probably a fire hazard anyway.

But yes, two classic silly season stories concerning Christmas have appeared in the British weekend papers or reported on the blogs.

The excellent Archbishop Cranmer yesterday reported that in Hemel hempstead, carol singers have been banned on grounds of 'health and safety.'

And the Daily Telegraph has reported that hairdressers in Norwich have been threatened with jail if they offer mulled wine to their customers!

Now, don't tell Auckland City Council, but many years ago, a salon I frequented once would give customers a glass of plonk with their cut and colour. But so they should, charging $100 plus!

Anyway, my colleague Barsnley Bill said he was to start a series of articles called Bizarro Britain, featuring the wackiest tales from the Mother Country.

It seems I have beaten him to it.

Perhaps my title could be from the sign off of a couple of earlier posts today.

Just what sort of a country am I returning to??!

If Only

If only I'd thought of this two weeks before the last election.

Maybe someone did think of this but I missed it.

It's the ultimate election campaign bill board.

The Selwyn Toogood bill board.



I hope some kind soul who knows how to use all the gismos can do it up for me.

The heading across the top is:-

"What's it to be, New Zealand?

The answer in blue and red, with respective pictures of a smiling John Key and a surly Helen Clark is:

On the left hand side in blue, "The Money" and on the right hand side in red "The Bag."

Recession: When you lose your money, so goes the toxic wife!!

There I was, perusing the (UK) Sunday Telegraph, reading an article on how Brown's tax rises will erode enterprise in Britain, when I came across a story revealing another cost of recession.

For some men, when they lose their jobs and money, they lose their toxic wife too.

The piece could well have been written by our beloved Cactus Kate. Indeed, it is ground our Hong Kong-based heroine has trodden on before.

Anyway, here's some juicy extracts from the Sunday Telegraph.

When the super-rich feel the pinch, inevitably, the Toxic Wife heads off.
The Toxic Wife, first identified in these pages almost two years ago, is a particular and terrifying species.
Not to be confused with the stay-at-home mother who selflessly devotes herself to the upbringing of her children, with all the housework and domestic chores that entails, the Toxic Wife is the woman who gives up work as soon as she marries, ostensibly to create a stable home environment for any offspring that might come along, but who then employs large numbers of staff to do all the domestic work she promised to undertake, leaving her with little to do all day except shop, lunch and luxuriate.
Having married her wealthy husband with his considerable salary uppermost in her mind, the Toxic Wife simply does not do "for richer, for poorer". Little Dorrit, she ain't.
Indeed, lawyers and financial advisers have reported a 50 per cent increase in the number of divorce inquiries since the financial markets collapsed in September.

The article continues:

The rich man is the career path, the meal ticket, and it doesn't matter how fat, old, balding or unattractive he is – it's solely about money.

And concludes:

As most of us are battening down the hatches and finding inventive ways to cope with the new austerity, some unfortunate men have not only lost their jobs, they are also having the scales ripped from their eyes.
The horrible truth has dawned: they married a woman who wanted them solely for their money.

What kind of a country am I returning to?

Flippin'Eck!! : state aid for drunken sluts

Flippin' eck!

Another flop from Gordon Brown's Britain: free flip-flops or jandals for drunken women!!!

Yes, the Boys in Blue have a $80,000 scheme which the Taxpayer's Alliance brands a waste of money.

But police say the programme will actually save money as the high-heeled drunken sluts won't injure themselves when they fall over!

What a land I am returning to?!!

Great News

Adolf heard this morning that on Thursday, the High Court in Auckland overturned the Immigration Review Authority's decision to recommend the deportation of Iranian apostate Bahareh Moradi and ordered that the whole process of review should recommence. To the eternal shame of the Immigration Department, it's barrister didn't even bother to show up at the hearing but caved in a couple of days beforehand, after claiming at an earlier hearing (July) that he 'needed more time to prepare his case.'



Presumably this means that for the time being she no longer faces the threat of immediate arrest and deportation.

Were she to have been forcibly returned to Iran, she faced the prospect of imminent and violent death at the hands of the current regime. No, she would be safe, according to our gullible authorities who know better than the Belgian and French intelligence services about these things and have relied on the notion that Iranian law does not yet prescribe the death penalty and therefore she would not be in danger. Of course, they just send out a team of goons in the middle on the night to do their dirty work. So much easier than messy laws and courts.

Adolf knows the young lady in question and her brother (who has permanent residence) quite well and in view of the sheer hell this family has suffered over the last year and a half, it would seem to Adolf that Minister Coleman could do himself and his party a huge favour by granting Ms Moradi residence before Christmas. From where I sit, the officials of the various departments and quangos have proven to be spectacularly incompetent.



Thus might be seen the stark difference between a compassionate government and its predecessor whose sole criterion and interest was a person's value to the Labour Party.

Sunday morning

Bernard Hickey once again makes required reading for the optimistic amongst us.
His analysis of where the chips have fallen is spot on.

And here's another good sign . There will be good buying out there for smart investors like these guys.

People will just have to cut their losses and move on. I have had to do a major restructure of how I run my business. Now the dust has settled, even though I've lost a bit of cash, I can see many opportunities opening up in the short term. I'll just be a bit leaner and hopefully smarter.

Matt McCarten really should move on. The election is over. His side lost. I can't believe that he gets paid to write this crap, let alone get it published.

Mike makes a start

Mike Williams, the Liarbour Party president, who probably did more to help National win the election than any other, is finally stepping down.

The Sunday Star-Times reports that 'Batman' will quit at a Liarbour Party gathering on Saturday.

Willimans has been an entertaining bagman.

He should be remembered for his associations with Owen Glenn and what that led to.

There was him caught lying on tape at that Liarbour conference last year.

There was the scurrying off to Melbourne at the height of the election campaign, and him being revealed as 'Batman' , the character leaking the H-fee documents to the Dominion-Post.

Indeed, perhaps Mike might deserve more credit for National's victory than we might originally think.

Nontheless, Uncle Helen remains a 'very old friend' of his.

Which brings me on to his directorships.

There are at least seven of them, reported Kiwiblog in April, bringing in nearly $200,000 a year.

Now, is obviously the time to start stripping him of those roles too, unless you feel he deserves to keep a few in recognition of his role in helping secure a National victory!

Coleman's Mustard

Bill Ralston writes about some of the hot stuff the bumbling fools at TVNZ can expect from their new Minister.

McCarten writes such arrant drivel that he soon will have have his rate per word cut to match his readership. He does not deserve comment. Wade though the knee-deep crap for yourself.

Unlike McCarten, Bill Ralston actually knows what he is talking about. He is a media insider so he is worth studying.




Where else in the world would you find a business that turns over three hundred million dollars and consistently makes no profit? Until today I did not know that this is our grand state run infotainment factory TVNZ. Ralston nails them to their profit and loss account thus:-

"It should not take long for Coleman to wonder why a company that rakes in more than $300 million a year in revenue makes no profit other than the subsidy it gets from him."



Ralston predicts only half the prescription.

"I suspect Coleman is determined to screw more dividends out of TVNZ, remove government subsidies from it and make it completely commercial."

The other half can wait for the next parliamentary term. The sale of TV2 and any other appendages with TV1 retained and well trimmed down.

Mr Ralston's comment on industry assistance indicate he needs to stick to broadcasting.

"I always thought the essence of capitalism was survival of the fittest and profits were earned in relation to the risk taken. Why should the taxpayer subsidise the losses of a commercial business in bad times when we don't share the profits in the good years?"

Because, dear boy, you DO share in the profits by way of taxation. No wonder he voted Labour all his life. He just doesn't get the bigger picture. Unless you are an ideological zealot, you don't let otherwise well run companies which employ large numbers of people who pay income tax go to the wall if you can insulate them from issues which could not have been reasonably predicted and which are likely to be temporary.

The surveillance state

There has been much commentary about Britain leading the world in camera surveillance, whether it be used on motorways or to monitor criminal activities in urban centres.

Bastard Holdborn now blogs on how such technology can now be used to predict such crime before it actually happens.

I thought of such comments of a surveillance state in Britain and wondering how far New Zealand was going the same way with my repeated trips to Hamilton this week.

Driving on the Southern Motorway in South Auckland you come across so many cameras.

Are they revenue generators? Or do they exist simply to warn the radio stations that it is rather busy around Manukau?

I recall around 5 years ago, I was involved in a minor accident in Auckland's CBD.

I was the designated driver in a friend's car and drove from West Auckland to O'Connell Street in the city centre.

As I approached a junction, I paused and a car ran into the back of us. The owner of the vehicle I was driving got out of the back seats and since he was drunk, the offending driver tried to say my drunken friend, not me, was the driver. The police likewise doubted I had driven because I had not adjusted my seat.

The case of who was driving went to court and it took nearly two years to prove that I , not my drunken friend, was driving and we were in the clear.

I had raised the issue that surely some traffic or anti-crime cameras might have recorded me driving from West Auckland to the CBD. I was told there were none, but think of the hassle saved had there been some.

Comrade Brown strikes again!

In a week when we hear of the death of NuLabour and the return of Old Liarbour, following a bout of taxraising and Nationalisation in the UK, we now see the arrest of a senior Tory MP, Damien Green, for receiving government leaks.

Indeed, isn't it the job of opposition MPs to accept and publish leaks that embarass the government.

The matter appears to have had little coverage in New Zealand, but here is commentary from Whale Oil, Adam Smith and our own Barnsley Bill.

But the strongest condemnations and clearest explanations come from a top trio of UK bloggers, Iain Dale, Guido Fawkes and Archbishop Cranmer.

The hypocrisy of Gordon Brown, the shame of the speaker of the Mother of Parliaments, the role of the police, all adds up to one almighty scandal, especially for a government in a country that was once a beacon for freedom, home to the Mother of Parliaments.

Now, we have a Britain ruled by a sleazy party where honours can be bought and anti-terrorist legislation aimed at tackling muslim murderers is instead used to silence pensioners at Labour conferences or freeze the assets of troubled Icelandic banks.

Anyway, read how a corrupt police force acts for a corrupt government.

And why does it matter to us Kiwis?

Well, where London leads, NZ Liarbour follows.

This is the type of thing that might well have happened here, had Uncle Helen won her coveted fourth term!

Home detention: Is that a punishment?

Some of our regular readers will know I have a mate who has been a naughty boy.

Last weekend, he committed his third drink driving offence in a year, his fourth in his lifetime.

He was told by his lawyer on Thursday that he faces three months home detention.

My mate did not seem keen on this, which made her tell him she wondered if he would prefer jail, which would have been a certainty had his last offence happened before October.

Now, I do get frustrated if there is a day I do not go out and do something 'constructive' even something as simple as picking up a few groceries.

But can being kept at home be considered a punishment?

Think about it? You have all your possessions around you? All your familiar things and knowing such a sentence was to arise, think of the preparations you could make to give yourself a comfortable internment.

For starters, I would buy/hire the biggest television I could find. I would subscribe to SKY and get all the tv channels I could, not to mention stock up on DVDs and CDs.

There would, of course, be the Internet. Imagine all the blogging you could do?

I would get some weights and a multi-gym for the garage.

I would get books as well, maybe complete some course in something or other.

I would of course teach myself how to sook some really exotic meals.

I understand you are also allowed in the garden, so you can top up your tan too!

Now, my mate likes to use the net to boost his love life. So he would arrange 'hook ups' too. Imagine getting so many 'booty calls.'

So, have I got it right? You can do just about anything you want, except leave your home?

Now, my mate had his case adjourned a few weeks and he hopes to get accepted at university.

He may finally have got the message he needs to turn his life around. If he does go to uni, then he would do something called community detention.

So, we'll see how it goes. But is home detention a real punishment?

Yes, it would drive you mad been confined to your home but it appears you can make it a very comfortable time indeed. What do you think?

SNN signs off for summer break

One of the things I enjoy listening to is Shire Network News.

The podcast usually comes out weekly, but the team has just given their first show this week since the US elections and they are taking a break until the new Year.

The podcast aims to 'defend the Anglosphere throught satire' and takes a strong anti-Islamist stance, though on many issues it is somewhat diverse.

I was introduced to the site by blogger Rick Giles and I hope I have introduced a few No Minister readers and contributors to it too.

Anyway, the team are a bit dejected following the ascension of the ObamaMessiah, so this week's show featured a debate on where the show might be going wrong. There was even a view the show was not Conservative or polemic enough, since it has tended to play things straight factually.

Well, I wish the contributors to Shire Network News a well earned break and I hope they return soon fighting fit, with the aim to help the Western World wake up to the Islamist threat around us.

How ironic its final show of the year came as the Islamists carried out yet another major atrocity.

So as Shire Network News takes a break, we are reminded why the show is essential listening.

PM, please put SNN on our blog roll, thank you. You have until the New Year.

PS Which of our contributors and commentators have listened to SNN? What did you think of it?

The Messiah Cometh

Adolf now understands how the Jews felt 2,000 years ago. They yearned for the Messiah, a King among Kings, an outstanding leader who would lead them from a life of soul destroying misery and deliver them into the promised land of milk and honey. They wanted a Lord of Lords.



So does New Zealand Cricket as it awaits the arrival of someone who can make more than fifty runs in a test innings and bat for more than twenty minutes without taking a swish at a ball outside the off stump.

When he arrives, he too will be revered for 2,000 years.

Cartoonists missing Helengrad? and what about the impressionists?

I don't wish to be hard with Emmerson at the New Zealand Herald.

I have always loved his Helen Clark, thinking he produces the best of our former Dear Leader.

But today I was looking at his Week That Was cartoons, and while his John Key was fine, there is still much work that needs to be done on his Bill English, as seen here on Thursday.

Tom Scott also has a decent Key but yes, his Uncle Helen was better too.

I guess it all comes down to practice and the nation's cartoonists will just have to keep on working on their drawings and refining their images of our new government.

But might some find a new regime damages their careers as some impressionists have found?

I recall as a boy UK impressionist Mike Yarwood reached the peak of his career for his impressions of former PM Harold Wilson, and it never recovered when Wilson was gone. Margaret Thatcher created a short career for Janet Brown, just as Sarah Palin recently worked wonders for Tina Fey.

Now, I recall someone used to do a plausible Helen Clark impression on tv (sorry, I've forgotten her name) but it appears New Zealand does not have the talent or the political will from our tv stations to have such impressionists on tv.

I am sure someone in Britain does a wonderful Gordon Brown on tv now (and is perhaps working on their Dave Cameron too) so it is a shame that New Zealand misses out on such satirical entertainment.

Let us us hope our cartoonists, satirists and impressionists can bring themselves up with the times.

And good luck to them!

The case for Hamilton

I know I've blogged on the matter before, but I think Hamilton is a lovely city.

I have just spent much of the past week helping a mate move down there from Auckland and had things been different, I would be happy to live there too.

For me, Hamilton is the right size, with plenty of bars, shops, cafes , etc, while not being too crowded like Auckland. It is also a little cheaper too and the prosperous town has many fine new suburbs.

Hamilton is also close to so many other places, like Raglan, the Coromandel, Tauranga, Rotorua, etc, etc, and it is just 80-90 minutes from Auckland.

So I am pleased to hear of a campaign from a Hamilton law firm to help change Hamilton's image by presenting the case for Hamilton.

I might also add that when I worked there in the mid-90s , Mr New Zealand often came from Hamilton. Being close to Auckland, 'Horny Hamilton' as it is sometimes known, is ideal for a dirty weekends, also having some of the most shaggable people around, as well as so many motels!

Financial Fran slams NZ journalism....and Liarbour

Fran O'Sullivan today lays boot into the media coverage of economic issues into the run up to the election.

He attack comes as she raises the prospect that Bill English's planned spend up may not be enough to save us from severerecession.

It remains one of the major failures of New Zealand journalism that Key - and also Helen Clark - were able to gloss over the likely extent of the crisis during their television debates and other interviews.
It should have been abundantly clear to any economically literate journalist who had done even a modicum of international research that the incoming Prime Minister would be faced with substantially worsened projections than were contained in the Treasury's pre-election forecasts.
But instead of doing the hard yards, exposing the real deterioration in the economic performance of our international trading partners, and seriously challenging the politicians - the TV hosts (in particular) plied them with far too many irrelevant questions.

Indeed, Fran is entirely correct. This blog has long suspeced a severe downturn and we did comment on the lack of media coverage of the economic crisis several times durting nthe election campaign.

Even today, there seems little prospect that the tv stations, for example, will offer some real analysis beyond the soundbites. The reported departure of Agenda is ominous.

But whose fault is this? The media is a sickly beast today, weakening with rampant costcutting. TVNZ, Fairfax, APN, have all shed jobs. Trouble is, such moves create newsroom that have no resources to spare for analysis or anything that smacks off investigative journalism. The reporters are reduced to rewriting government media handouts.

Is this what people want to watch? What they want to read in their papers? No, but such journalism comes cheap, and the spiral of decline continues.

But back to Fran, this time on economics.

She is coming round to our view that Liarbour helped cause our recession, just as the OECD is noticing.

This country's recession predates the fallout from the sub-prime mortgage crisis. A combination of usurious interest rates, highly-inflated food prices, drought and punishing oil prices tipped New Zealand over the line at the beginning of this year.

Indeed, whose high government spending caused those high interest rates?

Another John Key Performance Indicator

Bill English muses on the matter of reducing the loss of productive people to Australia.

According to The Herald he'd like to see the rate of loss cut in half. Adolf could not see anywhere in his musings a time line for this objective, which is a pity.


(photo pinched from The herald)

"In the year to October, 47,800 New Zealanders moved to Australia - 34,600 more than migrants coming the other way. It was the highest outflow since records began in 1978.

Mr English said that in the past, the long-term average of numbers migrating was about half of what it was now. Present levels were concerning. "We would hope in the future those peaks are significantly lower than where they are now."

I think John Key can make some political capital from the use of his name by giving his administration some JOHN KEY performance indicators. It should be realistic to expect a reduction from the current disastrous level of 48,000 to less than 40,000 within three years.

Of course there is the risk that the opposition will throw shit if the goals are not reached but on the other hand the government would be given big ups for sticking its neck out and actually telling everyone what it is trying to achieve, with our help and co-operation. Such a move would mark the biggest difference yet between National and Labour, the latter of which simply babbled platitudes about goals and then forgot about them as they launched the next round of buzz words and feel-good meaningless policy goals.

DomPost Over Eggs The Cake

A sensational headline proclaims that the NZ Government will breach international law by 'ruling out' (implies refusing) any Ross Sea rescue efforts for crews of endangered Japanese whaling fleets and/or their idiot pursuers.




That's a very big call, for if true, it represents a huge breach of maritime law and convention which does not seem to Adolf to sit well with the culture of the National Party. Not only would it be a huge breach but it would put at risk all NZ maritime personnel who found themselves in need of rescue by the Japanese authorities.

For what it's worth, Adolf would rescue the Japanese whalers and leave the pirates to freeze or drown.

So, what did Mr McCully actually say and has he been misreported? You figure it out.

The Dom needs a good kick up the arse.

"The conditions are very dangerous in the Ross Sea and there is no way anyone can expect New Zealand to render assistance. The word impossible springs to mind," Mr McCully said.

"We will not have the ability to offer assistance because we can't go and station vessels around the ocean in the expectation that someone's going to do something unwise.

"If there are any difficulties then, as is often the case, we're going to be reliant on any vessels that are in the area."

Also Tagged.

I got tagged by Oswald a week or so ago, and have been ignoring it up to this point but FFM's effort below is so risible I thought I should show him up.

1. November 28th is not an auspicious day for New Zealand, not only did a DC10 take a header into a mountain on this day as well as an Airbus going for a swim today but November 28th is also the date I arrived in New Zealand 20 years ago .

2. I passed a scholarship exam for Westminster boys school as a child but my mother would not let me go. Probably a good thing because being buggered and locked in my trunk while walking around all day in a cassock and ruffle sounds less appealing now than it did then.

3. Although I did get my turn in the cassock as a choir boy at my local C of E Norman era church (St Mary's in Baldock, North Hertfordshire), I sang in St Albans Abbey and at St Pauls for the Queen. My days as a child prodigy chorister came to an abrupt end when I got too cosy with our choirmasters daughter as a fresh faced 12 year old.

4. I am the grandson of the man who worked alongside Logie Baird as an industrial glass blower and who helped make the first working CRT.

5.I played lacrosse for the East of England senior team as a 15 year old against Cambridge university, scored a goal and lost my first adult tooth within 5 minutes of scoring.

6. I have not been to a Rugby match since the RWC in Sydney in 2003, I will never again experience the emotional high that I experienced during that game and Rugby now bores me. This comes after a lifetime of attending Test matches in Europe, NZ and OZ.

7. My name is Colin but as I am the fourth generation of my family bearing that name I am known by my middle name Russell, I regularly thank my mum for this because my fathers side of the family have a terrible record in naming eldest sons. My Great granfather was a Wlater, Grandad was known as Hector, and My father as Malcolm. The curse has been broken with my eldest who is James (But his middle name is Colin). My surname dates back to the Norman Conquest and is cheese eating surrender monkey in origin. The literal translation is Beautiful Mountain..

I shall not tag anyone because everybody I want to read has already done it..

Looks Like Rodney has more work to do!

Bill English says what savings are found will be spent elsewhere.

So if National is to meet certain election promises, then our Epsom warrior will be extra busy trying to find the cash.

No wonder Rodney fainted!

Life just seems so damned unfair!

Poster competition

British blogger Iain Dale has a funny poster created to attack a leading Conservative.

Now, I am sure with both Liarbour and National performing their own U-turns, I am sure we can come up with something like it here?

What do you think?

What ideas do you have?

Who is Wanted in New Zealand?

Tagged

A few days ago I was tagged by M&M.
So here are the seven useless facts about me.

1- When I was a kid, I wanted to be a tv weatherman when I grew up.
2- By the time I went to sixth form, I wanted to become an accountant, but got involved with the student newspaper at university and settled on journalism.
3- I have a 'thing' about maps, often finding them fascinating. I have a thing about roads too and I often used to take old maps and draw new roads on them. Sometimes my doodles consist of imaginary maps. If I could not be Prime Minister, I would happily be Transport minister and would happily motorways criss-crossing our land. Wellington-Whangarei motorway, anyone?
4- Sorry Adolf, but while you have a lovely Holden, I'm more of a Falcon man, having two when I lived in Australia a couple of years back. Now, I drive a Mitsubishi Carisma which has none.
5- When I was a kid, I used to just about worship cats, always kissing and cuddling them. Now I'm allergic to them.
6- I haven't always been a right-wing bastard. Growing up in a Yorkshire mining village, I recalled thinking Tories were 'snobs' when I was very young, until discovering my self-employed parents were Conservatives. And I really didn't become a Thatcherite until a few weeks off school with chicken pox gave me a chance to what all the main party conferences and being enthralled by the "U-Turn if you want to, the Lady's Not for Turning!" speech.
7- And finally, talking of Margaret Thatcher, I too was born above a grocer's shop. But I'm not sure if my parents had a VG or a Spar.

Now, as this tag has done the rounds, I won't tag any others, but our commenters are free to add any revealing useless facts about themselves.

Those Greens are such bright sparks!

Our own Greens, the watermelon party, is unhappy at National overturning Liarbour's ban on traditional lightbulbs.

You might remember our own Greens preferring the new so-called ec0-friendly bulbs that contain dangerous chemicals like mercury and present a health hazard.

Which is why another Green Party is angry at its government not doing enough to warn the public about such dangers!

So which Greens are the bright sparks? Ours? or the one in Cyprus!

Hat tip: The Briefing Room

Air New Zealand Crash

Update: It just gets worse. The reporting that is. Now The Herald chimes in with this gem:-

"The plane crash may been witnessed by a nearby boat which saw it crash........"

The illiterates at Radio Left Wing News are reporting the crash at sea of an Air New Zealand Airbus while on a training flight in France. One death is confirmed.

Here's a sample of the reporting:

".....Air New Zealand says it's trying trying to verify if the reports are true."

It Could Have Been Here

Danyl over at DimPost rightly and quickly identified the secondary culprit in the awful drama that is Mumbai, where the death toll now has risen to 125.

It is the Indian Intelligence Service which completely failed to detect the plot. In a later post, DIM attributes the organisation to the Pakistani Secret Service and it is hard not to agree with his analysis.

How easy would it be for a gang of Muslim fanatics to pull off something similar here?

A piece of cake, perhaps?

First, pick your target. Where in New Zealand can you find a convenient concentration of wealthy Americans, herded together ready to be killed? In Mumbai the terrorists identified these clusters and attacked a couple of swanky hotels and restaurants. Here in Auckland, there is one obvious and easy target.



A big, fat, juicy cruise ship, packed with between three and four thousand victims.

The nice thing about cruise ships is that you know where they will be and when, almost to the minute. So, all you have to do is figure out how to blow a few holes in the hull below the waterline as she steams out into deep water, preferably before the lifeboat drill has been carried out.

Maybe it's not too difficult. Adolf is neither a naval architect nor a security specialist but a determined little gang of perhaps four people, with some careful study and preparation beforehand, might conclude as follows. (Remember, it was dead easy for the Froggies to sit a ship on its arse in Auckland a few decades ago.)

The Plan

Attach twenty limpet mines at intervals along one side of the ship's hull, about twelve feet below the water line.

These are timed to explode simultaneously as the departing ship is exiting the channel and entering the Hauraki Gulf. (Probably close to where the Americas Cup races were sailed.) The objective is to let enough water in, fast enough to turn the ship turtle within a short time, say thirty minutes. Twenty holes, each two metres wide, should do the trick. Maximum carnage, no warning, flat footed authorities. No-one has a chance.

Of course, by this time the team will be safely on board flights to Pakistan via Australia.

The Preparation

Twenty mines are purchased on the black market, each mine containing perhaps ten kilos of explosive. They are shipped to Fiji where they are transferred by Muslim brothers onto a 32 foot yacht which sails to NZ. As the yacht passes down the coast of Northland it is met by a snapper fishing expedition off Hauhora and the 250kg cargo is transferred into a twenty foot launch which returns to land and is winched onto it's trailer and driven to Auckland.

A small narrow beamed boat, about fourteen feet long is purchased, along with a set of dive gear.

The Operation

At about 0300 on the morning of the targets arrival in Auckland, the small boat with its cargo, diver and driver, sets off from the Birkenhead boat ramp and parks itself under the wharf at which the cruise ship is to be moored. The ship arrives at 0700 and disgorges it's passengers by 1000. It is scheduled to depart from Auckland at 1930. At 1030 the team begins installing the mines, two at a time at a depth of three metres, and the job is completed in just under two hours. No one can see what is going on under the wharf next to the ship. There is maximum privacy.

The Withdrawal

Using a buddy breather, the diver escorts the driver to the other members of the team who happen to be passing close by in their 20 foot launch. At 1300 they are quickly pulled aboard over the seaward side. The team proceeds to shore, dumps the boat in a back street in Birkenhead or Northcote and drives to the air port.

At 2010 the balloon goes up and the ship goes down, right in front of the wealthy denizens of NorthShore City's East Coast Bays.

Death toll - 3500

Survivors - 500

The weakest point in the plan is the risk of someone spotting the diver and driver being pulled aboard, mid harbour during broad daylight.

The evil strikes! (yet again)

Yes, the barbaric evil faith Islam has murdered once more in its name, this time in Mumbai, India.

While we express our disgust or our indifference at this latest example of Jihad, more is yet to come.

India faces further trouble amid its multi-faith democracy from this evil 7th Century death cult.

But India is not alone.

We are all under threat.

It is time for us all to wake up!

And halt all muslim immigration to the West, as well as seeking to defeat the terrorists wherever and whenever they strike!

This website reveals more.

Should Government save the wonder of Woolies?

Woolworth's in Britain is a slightly different kettle of fish to what you get here in New Zealand or over the Tasman.

In fact, I cannot think of a close Kiwi equivalent of the glorified newsagent, cum sweet shop, music and gifts retailer.

Last winter, I thought the Woolworths stores were looking a little tired and past it.

Anyway, along with another regular UK chain, MFI, the store has called in the receivers.

But as Archbishop Cranmer notes, if the banks can demand and get government help, why shouldn't the retailers?

But could you please explain to His Grace why incompetent, inefficient banks are worth bailing out, but there are no plans afoot to nationalise Woolworths?

Why is the preservation of pick’n’mix not worth a few paltry millions of taxpayers’ money, when the banks have had hundreds of billions?

Why are the jobs of hundreds of banking executives worth preserving, despite their shoddy business plans, while thousands of humble shop-workers are forced to pay the price for Labour’s economic incompetence?

What is this Socialism that bails out the very wealthy and powerful financial institutions, but leaves the weak retailers to die?

What is this Socialism that sides with the might of Mammon while the poor face penury?

What is this Socialism that feeds the banking fat cats on lean and expensive meat, but leaves the workers to the dog-eat-dog world of the market?

Did Gordon Brown claim to have a moral compass?It must be broken.

Anyway, strange as it sounds, New Zealand may well go down the path laid out by Gordon Brown : Bill English is considering bail outs of big businesses facing trouble!

Just who and what can he possibly mean? I retain the concerns I expressed yesterday.

And I don't think Archbishop Cranmer would be too happy either!

No you're not in Kansas any more, dumbasses

I followed the Dubai beach sex case with interest, having been a Middle East expat myself.

These two broke the cardinal rule of Gulf State expat life: appearances must be maintained. In the Gulf states, keeping up appearances is everything. There appears to be very little drunkenness, adultery and fornication, and such that does appear is heavily punished. There is of course no lack of drunkenness, adultery and fornication among the locals, it's just that great lengths are gone to to keep it private. If you don't keep it private, you can expect to get dealt to. So if you're a typical Kuwaiti yoof, your parents ship you overseas so you can shag Western sluts for a few years until you've lost enough spunk to be capable of getting married. After that there's the maid, who won't dare get pregnant unless she wants to "commit suicide" by hurling herself from the balcony, and there's the apartment you maintain somewhere with a Filipina in it. Drinking is done in the privacy of your own home or Filipina's apt, and drunk driving not indulged in unless you have very influential friends. Your wife will have to settle for making friends with attractive young ladies and inviting them all round for coffee while hubbo's at work (which he won't be for more than 5 hours a day).

The expats of course are not Kuwaitis and have a different set of rules to live by. They are stratified by their value as a commodity, with Whitey (well, Westerners anyway) at the top and Bangladeshis at the bottom. Whitey in fact occupies an entirely different stratum from any Third World expat, again on the basis of commodity value. Third Worlders are a buyer's market- they're queuing up to get into the Gulf States, so there's always plenty more where that one came from. Whitey is a seller's market - not that many Whiteys want to live in Kuwait, so you want to hang on to the ones you've got. For this reason, Whitey can get away with stuff that would see Third Worlders in jail. As an example, one evening I was out with 2 Indian guys. We came to a Police checkpoint, and the Indians got out their ID cards. I realised I'd forgotten mine. The Indians freaked out - we were in deep shit, these motherfuckers were going to throw us in the cells, what was I thinking? We got to the front, the cop carefully inspected the Indians' IDs, glanced at me, then waved us through. It was rather hard to ignore what this said about our differing statuses as far as the Kuwaiti authorities were concerned.

But from the cops point of view: (a)what Whitey is going to be in Kuwait as an illegal immigrant? We usually can't wait to get back out of the place with our money; and (b)Whitey is going to be the valuable posession of a rich and presumably influential Kuwaiti - leave him alone unless he's doing something in public.

That's the important bit - leave him alone unless he's doing something in public. Kuwait is even more conservative than Dubai and alcohol is an illegal drug. Fortunately, my apartment block had a walled garden out the back with a swimming pool and bar, so party time was most weekends. It's kind of obvious to the surrounding neighbourhood that Whitey's building is hosting another raucous pissup, and in fact the people in the buildings overlooking our garden could watch us doing it. But the cops never came, because we were obeying the rules - it was behind our garden wall, kept among fellow barbarians.

All good. But: if we'd been mug enough to take the pissing up and poolside groping across the road to the beach, the cops would have been along to cart us down the cells in no time. There are rules, and it's best to stick to 'em. I didn't feel a whole lot of sympathy for Acors and Palmer.

Rock bottom?

I came home from work feeling good today.

I've got a couple of projects lined up for next year and it seems I'll be borrowing money for them at around 3% less than what I'm paying this year. For good honest long term stuff this is the difference between a shit fight and sleeping well at night.

I'm beginning to think that the worst maybe over.

The graphs of the world may have leveled out. Billions of dollars have been created and spent. I don't profess to understand where this money has come from, printing presses would be my guess. At the end of the day money is a manmade invention, used and abused like any other commodity. All I know is that I will be treating cash with a lot more respect in the future.

As a wise man once said to me.
"Keep your hand on your cash and your cash at hand"
and
Don't trust men with big hats and no cattle"

We may be heading for a simpler world where every dollar of profit is a dollar earned and hopefully taxed lower.

As an aside, I heard Bruce Shepard giving Hanover a superb going over on 1ZB. It seems that they are hoping that $10 million cash is going to make all their problems disappear. If I had any money with them I would be on the phone to the recievers.

The Parable Of The Standard

I don't usually waste my time reading the drivel that is written at the Labour Party funded and staffed propaganda trough called The Standard but a friend of mine spoke to me about it today and almost became emotional.

"Jesus George on a bicycle!" he exclaimed, "the bloody new government isn't even sworn in and these idiots are screaming and yelling about 'what they might do.' "

My advice to my friend was that I did not go out of my way to read Pravda so I don't see why I should bother to read its intellectually handicapped juvenile brother.



Go over and have a look for a laugh.

The funniest part of the whole show comes when you realise these guys believe the crap they write. It gets even funnier when you see the number of authors they use. Hell, it took less people to write the Bible.

Then for the real rib cracker, go and have a look at their comments. They are pretty much all fellow authors patting each other on the back and piously editing comments to separate the sheep shit from the goat shit.

They literally spend all bloody day commenting on each others' sbloggerings in order to improve their Tumeke ratings.

Pravda in drag.

Whale Oil In Restrained Mode

The following post by Whaleoil is reproduced in its entirety because it says exactly what Adolf thinks on this shameful aspect of what once was a proud nation.

"There is much angst around following the Nia Glassie case. Garth George has written an article and DPF has taken exception to it.

I think they both are missing the point.

We have become a society that tolerates and indeed allows violence against children it is just a matter of where you draw the line that is the argument.

Garth George draws the line at conception and David Farrar draws the line at birth. (I think, perhaps he would like to clarify when it is ok to kill babies and when it is not.)

My view is that we are indeed a sick society at whatever point we kill and excuse it away with weasel words like foetus, procedure, first trimester etc.

Likewise my view about most of the recent cases of horrific child abuse is that they are no more and no less anything but late term abortions. The simple fact is that the parents of the children had no more respect for the life of the child than someone having a “procedure”.

You see if we accept that you can kill children at up to 21 weeks from conception then why not at birth or why not at 5 years old, or even 18 just before they can vote. For me there is no difference. The Nia Glassie’s and Kahui twins are simply late term abortions by parents who no longer respected the life of their child. As long as we fail to respect human life then we will continue to get these case and no one should be at all shocked by it all."

Not Too Sick To Kill

The chap who murdered Austin Hemmings has been named.

His name in not important but what caught my eye was his occupation which is listed as 'sickness beneficiary.' (On RLW News, not in The Herald report.)

From what illness can one suffer which renders one too ill to work, yet leaves one able, with a knife, to attempt to murder one person and successfully kill another ?

Why did The Herald refrain from listing his occupation?

Adolf hopes someone is asking some hard questions of The Hon Paula Bennet's new department.

Those Headline Writers Again

APN's new owners will have to do something about the standard of The Herald's headlines.

Man acquitted of rape conviction

Adolf has always understood one was 'acquitted' of a charge. One cannot be acquitted of a conviction. This fellow had his conviction overturned at a retrial. In other words he was charged a second time and acquitted rather than found guilty.

acquit
· v. (acquitted, acquitting)
1 formally declare not guilty of a criminal charge.

Uncle Helen's Holiday: Caption contest

Funny, I don't recall Stuff running a pic with the story yesterday.

Oh well, we better have a caption competition.

Since Uncle Helen is looking a bit old and tired, here's my entry.

The residents at the nursing home thought the new guests looked a little familar, but couldn't remember who they were.

Liarbour's failings laid bare

Last night in my Bill English post, I touched upon our worsening economic situation.
The OECD clearly highlights the failings of the Helengrad years with a couple of clear statements.

New Zealand has entered recession ahead of other OECD countries, a victim of simultaneous domestic and foreign shocks," it said.

Oh! I wonder why we entered recession ahead of others? Who was to blame for these domestic shocks. Some answers to follow:

"The outlook remains subdued because the large macro-economic imbalances which have built up over the past decade - inflation, housing overvaluation, high household debt and a huge current account deficit - will take some time to unwind."

And who was responsible for that? who was in office then?, but Uncle Helen and her Fiscal Fool!

Bill's Big spend up

So Bill English has announced a $7billion 'economic stimulation package' as Treasury and others announce yet worsening economic figures and banks tighten their lending criteria.

Other governments also do their bit to 'help.'

I guess the devil will be in the detail and we won't know how helpful such spending sprees will help until we know exactly what the spending will go on.

However, I have some concerns about the effectiveness of spending your way out of recession.

We heard horror stories about Liarbour's 'Decade of deficits' but wouldn't it be hypocrical if National delivered an even longer spell of debt.

I also don't remember the Thatcher government of Britain in the 1980s also spending their way out of trouble. It saved Britian by tough budget restraints, free markets and 'monetarism.'

However, like some beast from beyond the grave, Keynes is back in vogue again!

Now, Britain has just announced its 'recession-busting' big spend up, with added old-style socialism of tax increases for the wealthy. Bloggers Iain Dale, Archbishop Cranmer, and Guido Fawkes look at the economics and politics of PM Brown's mini-budget, with a major focus on Britain's massive debts- debts New Zealand could be rushing towards.

Bill English had certainly better be careful not to send us down that same red-ink stained track.

Can Rodney and Roger stop him? Do we want them to?

In the meantime, enjoy Gordon Brown selling Britain's soul to the Devil.

Didn't he do well!!

Not bad for the boy from the State House.

But John Key and New Zealand can look back at his first foray on the Global scene with pride.

Key was the man in demand and the man to watch.

As reported earlier, he was sought by Bush, he was sought by the Chinese.

Relations look good with Aussie PM Kevin Rudd.

And in Britain, Key saw the Queen- the one woman who has guided prime ministers and observed the political scene for 50-odd years, gaining an unrivalled knowledge on the mastercrafts of politics and diplomacy.

Key also saw current PM Gordon Brown, and hopefully learnt how NOT to deliver a mini-budget.

Key also saw the next UK PM David Cameron as well as London Mayor Boris Johnson.

Now, I recall a Stuff poll a few days back which showed a majority of people believing the Key government would not do well.

Funny Stuff polls have turned so anti-National.

Were people still so keen to get rid of Uncle Helen that they still voted for Key?

Either way, if the poll is right then expectations are low.

This can only be to National's advantage as Key, National and their ACT allies carry on with their sound start.

First in creating the government at such rapid speed and with strength and unity.

Then, with John Key's appearance on the world stage, where he has met so many important people, an effort I am sure will pay dividends in time.

Now, as Key returns home, I am sure he will also roll his sleeves up to deal with the almighty mess he and his government have inherited.

Well done John! And good luck with the tasks ahead!

What IF SHE had won?

David Farrar reports of the Herald on Sunday having written an alternative November 9 front page reporting Uncle Helen hanging on as the country's Dear Leader.

Now, during the US Presidential election campaign I came across various spoof stories about the US as Obamerica, and the disasters that would happen to the country, such as Bill Ayers becoming education sectretary, Islamist facism on the rise, etc, etc.

Now, in a similar vein, what horrors might have befallen New Zealand had Liarbour won Election 2008?

You have up to 2011 for the timeline.

Might John Key have survived as leader?

Might the Kiwi economy survive three more years of Cullenomics?

How big the Kiwi Exodus then?

What would Cullen have delivered in his mini-budget?

And when would she have had a statue erected in her honour in every town in the land?

Who's the naughty boy!!

Roarprawn is back swimming.

And after a moving and upsetting piece on her own experience of violent abuse yesterday, BustedBlonde is back to her target of rooting out corruption.

Which defeated Labour Cabinet Minister is said to have used taxpayer money to fly his taxpayer-paid and supposedly nonpartisan portfolio private secretaries to fly to Auckland to hand out Labour Party propaganda around his electorate and provide other advice and assistance to his campaign?
Hint: It’s the same defeated Labour Cabinet Minister who, as part of his electorate office’s work in assisting people to enrol to vote, is said to have destroyed voter enrolment forms from people suspected of being likely to vote National, and only forwarded the enrolment forms to the Electoral Commission if he thought the potential voter was a Labourite.

Another hint: It’s the same defeated Labour Cabinet Minister who used his taxpayer-paid staff to write creepy congratulations letters to every kid in his electorate who won a prize at their school prizegivings. And we’re not just talking secondary-school kids. Come third in chess at your local primary school in his electorate and you could expect to get a personally signed letter from your local MP – with handwritten “PSs” to the parents. Yuk.

Inventory 2 thinks it might be Chris Carter, but my guess is Damien O'Connor.

Anyone any other ideas?

Hat tip: Roar Prawn

Something about Mary, the one where the government lets you die like a dog.

As some of you may be aware I live in the Bay of Islands, I travel widely within the region and come into contact with all manner of people. Tonights post is about a lady I have met.
Mary is in her mid 70's, she is a widow and lives in Kaikohe. Mary is sick, she has all the usual symptoms of a person with heart problems, tightness in her chest, breathless and lacking any energy at all. She has a home help that pops in and a variety of other people in her life that help her get things done. Over the nine months or so that I have known her I have noticed a marked deterioration in her health and mental state. She is on multiple pills, multiple times a day and the jolly Mary I met has deteriorated into a frightened husk.

Her GP is trying to manage the situation and sent her to Whangerai to see a specialist, this took 2 months. She saw the specialist who told her she needed to be booked in for a scan. It took 3 months to get the appointment for the scan. She had the scan last week and it turns out she needs a bypass.
Whangerai don't do these so she is now on a waiting list to see a specialist in Auckland, this is expected to take another 3 months, once she has seen the specialist in Auckland she will wait another 3 months for the necessary scans to be done again. If they confirm what everybody already knows she will then go on the waiting list for a bypass operation, the waiting list is currently around 9 months.
All up that is 20 months. Mary will die before she ever gets on the operating table, and she knows it. I had a cuppa with her today and she has shrunk in a week. She has effectively been sentenced to death by our public health system.
The rational among us might say she has had a good and long life and we cannot fix everybody.

To them I would say, come up to Kaikohe and have a cuppa with Mary and tell her that her life is unimportant and she is not worth saving.

Billions of extra funding in a decade and we still cannot get the basics right.

Another friend of mine had a bypass operation in Auckland three weeks ago, 12 days after seeing the private specialist that his doctor referred him to. He has Southern Cross. The hospital he was in was half empty and apparently has extra capacity just waiting to be switched on when our new government decides to utilise all means to beat our waiting lists.
I really hope they do it soon because my friend is going to die

Well done Paula!

One of the Herald reporters who was a delight with her balance, fairness and honesty, was Paula Oliver, its political reporter.

Paula is joining John Key's press office, so good on her!

Stuff today reports a couple of appointments and there will be more to follow.

There looks set to be quite a change of faces around the Beehive in the comms/media scene. I saw the Greens advertising in the Weekend Herald, looking to appoint its media team for the new year.

I understand that the new government is seeking many senior people.

My view is that a government with many new faces will need some more experienced hands, and there will be those from the Bolger/Shipley era seeking and gaining such work too .

The state of the media, with many retrenchments at newspapers and the like, also means there are many experienced hands available.

My PR industry contacts also tell me that their businesses are suffering too, so there will be many talented people seeking such work.

This is good for John Key, since as a newbie government with much to do, National and ACT will have much to do to put across their message and 'sell' their policies.

It's not about spin but the government will certainly have its hands full countering a sometimes or rather often suspicious media, so such talent will be sorely needed.

So good luck to Paula and all the others coming on board. I wonder who else there will be?

Dear Leader goes troppo!

The mystery has been solved.
Uncle Helen has been to Samoa.


Hang on! How dare she not be supporting the New Zealand tourism industry in its hour of dire need! :)


Just joking, I thought I was a Herald on Sunday journalist writing about John Key!

Return of the pointy-haired boss

Just been reading about the joys of having dim bulb pointy-haired boss Tony Ryall back in charge of health at The Dim-Post, NRT and MacDoctor. NRT is particularly good on why Ryall's pronouncements on A&E are crap. Anyone who's worked in management (hell, anyone who reads Dilbert) knows how managers respond to these kind of arbitrary performance measurement decrees.

It's a handy reminder that you can't get better govt by replacing the current failures with previous failures. As a chronic gimp, I'm a regular consumer in the health system. No matter what complaints my No Minister colleagues may have had about the health system under the last govt, I can assure them as a regular customer that my personal experiences of it were vastly improved under Labour, and the system under Ryall constituted a low point. I fully expect new lows to be achieved in the next few years, unless Key gets serious about stripping the dead wood out of his Cabinet.

A better place?

Here is a little look at our future.
A glimpse into the mindset of average people.

Fearful that economic conditions could get worse and stay that way, Americans are showing an enthusiasm for thriftiness not seen in decades.

and

This behavioural shift isn't simply about spending less. The New Frugality emphasises stretching every dollar. It means bypassing the fashion mall for the discount chain store, buying "It is a whole reassessment of values," said Candace Corlett, president of the consulting firm WSL Strategic Retail. "People are learning again to say 'no, not today'."

and

"Everybody has been trying to keep up with the Joneses and trying to look rich when they're not," said Erin Pettingill, 24, a married mother of two preschool children in Provo, Utah "You can't necessarily have everything you want when you want it.

This will apply equally well here in New Zealand. The world may actually be a better place if governments can learn the lesson as well.

Frugal citizens and "bells and whistles"government will not be a happy mix.

Aaaaah It Feels So Good

When editorials applaud the stripping away of bullshit from health bureaucrats and closet Labour shills bemoan the intrusion of hard headed cost cutters into the hallowed halls of local government you just know that the place is on the right track at last.

Brian Rudman could not have chosen a better headline (if he did choose it) 'Hide and Local Government Scary Mix.' For once he's right but it's the bozos who infest local government who will be scared and it's rate payers who will be smiling in anticipation of seeing their tormentors from 'the council' get their fiscal wings clipped.



The Herald would do well to take Rudman aside and suggest he desists from his vendetta against Rodney Hide. It is tiresome and will be costing the paper circulation if it allows him to keep up his puerile campaign of denigration. Rodney Hide has been elected to govern, Mr Rudman. Get used to it or bugger off with your good mate Mike Williams.

Adolf looks forward to seeing Tony Ryall direct DHBs that all people presenting at hospital A & E departments should be greeted first by an examining doctor instead of a manager demanding paper work first be completed.



Reminds me of a 1970s ABC interview with the late ex Victorian state premiere the popular and pugnacious Sir Henry Bolte.

Bolte was up from the bush for the Royal Easter Show and he was asked 'How are things in the bush, Sir Henry?' ('In the bush' is Australian for 'down on the farm.')

The reply - 'Weeell son, its the worst drought I can remember, wool prices are down, we can't get much for our lambs, the web worm has put paid to the wheat crops this year and we've had some pretty bad bush fires but, you know, in spite of all these difficulties, people are optimistic and full of hope because WE HAVEN'T GOT A BLOODY LABOR GOVERNMENT IN CANBERRA!'

Liarbour's tax bombshell--what we might have seen too!

Britain seems to have just received the kind of December mini-budget promised by Michael Cullen, which thankfully, he never had the chance to deliver.

Now, Britain has just had such a mini-budget aimed to get the country out of a recession.

Main features include higher borrowing, tax increases for top earners, and lower VAT (GST), plus a bit more money spent on infrastructure.

Press reaction seems mixed, even from supposed supporters like the Guardian.

Now, since Helengrad tended to follow UK Liarbour, I can only wonder whether such polices might have also been delivered by Mr Cullen. Lower GST, more borrowing and higher taxes for the better off not only seems very Old Liarbour but very Cullenesque too!

Who said What?

Who said what.....
It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?"

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: "Patrick Henry, 1775."

The teacher said. "Very good! Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?'"

Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar: "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrasekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do."

She heard a loud whisper: "F*ck the Indians.""Who said that?" she demanded.

Chandrasekhar put his hand up: "General Custer, 1862."

that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke." The teacher glared around and asked "All right! Now, who said that?"

Again, Chandrasekhar answers,"'George H.W. Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.

"Now furious, another student yells,"'Oh yeah? Suck this!" #Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

Now with almost mob hysteria someone said "You little shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you."

Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him, 2004."

The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, "Oh shit, we're screwed!"

And Chandrasekhar said quietly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

H/T Shelly @ Theo Spark

Snowvember greets the end of climate change

Fresh nails on the coffin of climate change are falling with each flake of November snow.

My parents place in lowland Yorkshire enjoyed a light covering of snow on Sunday, the earliest snow they had had for some time.

I certainly cannot remember snow in November when I was a lad in the 1970s and 1980s.

November was the month of frost and fog.

But this year Britain has experienced early snow, as it did last month.

Other major snowfalls have been reported across Scandinavia.

And ouir friends across the Tasman, like the South Island, are also experiencing snow even though we are almost in summer.

But in case you think one snowstorm doesn't herald an ice age, the evidence against Global Warming is mounting.

Maybe the climate is changing, but changing back to what it was!

How very appropriate

Better late than never, but just seen this few days old story about Michael Jackson turning Muslim.

Considering some of the wacky things done in the name of this evil creed, it is just so appropriate for it to have Jackson as a new follower.

Of course, looking at Islam in general, I can forsee a few other adoptive converts: Hitler, Stalin, Pol Pot.

Any others?

Rodney to the throne!

I'm flushed with happiness with Rodney Hide.
And I'm not yanking anybody's chain!
But our hyperactive member for Epsom was on Close Up just now talking about toilets.
Apparantly, current rules means a new toilet can need eight inspections and building rules making projects cost thousands more than necessary, even a turd, I mean a third, of the total cost.
As regulatory responsibility minister Rodney was in fighting form, with another great interview with Mark Sainsbury.
We are certainly seeing how ACT is adding to the ACTion we are seeing from our National-led government.
This, coupled with Rodders also opposing the RMA follies concerning that North Shore supermarket clearly shows how ACT is lifting the lid on red tape and bureaucracy.
He seems to be on a roll, as well!!

Public servants we could do without, number 1 in an occassional series.

Judge Gary MacAskill

The model citizen pictured below is called Grant Alexander Dey




The story from Stuff, with selected highlights in italics below.

Staff and pupils at Christchurch's Wainoni Primary School will get apology letters from a 41-year-old man who caused a lockdown at the school when he threatened to shoot two staff a fortnight ago.

Heavily tattooed beneficiary Grant Alexander Dey pleaded guilty in Christchurch District Court today to charges of threatening to kill, and possession of cannabis, the Christchurch Court News website reported.

He also admitted charges of theft, and unlawful possession of a knife, which do not relate to the school incident.


Right then, fairly serious charges, guilty as charged.. What do you think the judge did next?

Judge Gary MacAskill remanded him in custody for a pre-sentence report and sentence on December 24.

Fair enough, no problem so far..

Remember what the charges are, in fact go back up and read them again because the next quote is a goodie..

He asked for a report on his suitability for home detention, even though Dey has no home address.


HE IS HOMELESS AND THE JUDGE IS CONSIDERING HIM FOR HOME DETENTION.

Simon Power, you have got a long and tortuous journey in front of you to sort this out.
I recommend you all click through and read the story...

Why Is This Case Being Brought?

Our police can't charge a Labour Party member who bashed a spectator with a megaphone while in full view of a close by officer, they couldn't investigate the theft of Dr Brash's e-mails until a year had drifted by, the then Prime Minister's own fraudulent activities were pushed aside but we can hire a PI to watch the bloody world cup rugby to see if naughty TV3 ran a few adverts on Sunday morning?

Why the hell did they just not set their VCRs to record the damned thing?

Well the answer is, of course, that the Ministry of Culture and Heritage doesn't sully it's intellectual fingers with Rugby. After all the Minister has instructed that Rugby is only to be used for prime ministerial photo opportunities. It is NOT something cultured people of heritage would or should ever watch.

What an appalling waste of tax payers' money. I wonder how many courses of Herceptin or other life preserving non funded drugs could have been funded instead of this fiasco.

New Miracle Cure For Aids

Radio Left wing is reporting a local council in Papua (that part of Indonesia which butts onto PNG) has a proposal for eliminating the spread of aids which has become a devastating problem amongst its whole f**king population.



The proposal is to micro-chip aids carriers who are known to possess aggressive sexual tendencies.

Naturally there is a hue and cry, with the usual blether about human rights and all sorts. Apparently it is a 'human right' these days to impregnate anything that walks with your lethal seed if you feel the urge.

RNZ did not go into any detail of the actual micro-chipping but Adolf has done some research.

Apparently the chip is embedded beneath the flaccid foreskin while the recipient is suitably restrained. Upon the onset of erection, a signal is sent to the pituitary gland which emits a stream of libido inhibitors into the blood stream and lo and behold, the moment has passed before it has arrived. Problem solved. No matter how pissed, no matter how spaced out, no erection, no jiggy jig, no spread of HIV. Simple but brilliant.

New Zealand Cricket is investigating, in the hope that this breakthrough when reversed, might put some spine into our batting line up.