With apologies to Steven Spielberg.
Let's have a bit of sport and dream up some 'zingers' for Sarah Palin to use against her apnoeaic rival, Joe Biden, the aged and hair plugged gaffe machine who might have been Vice President of the United States, had he enough brains to run alongside a candidate of substance.
"When Putin calls at 3.00 a.m. you want somebody answering the phone who doesn't 'vote present."
" Senator, in two years as Governor, I have cut taxes, rooted out corruption, rejected earmark wastage and successfully taken on the oil companies. That's a hundred times more than you have achieved in thirty five years of gas bagging in Washington."
"Senator, in thirty five years you have requested more than one million dollars of federal earmarks for every day of your tenure - that's nearly one point three billion dollars. Senator, you are the problem, not the solution."
"Senator, I am more competent and better prepared to be President than Barack Obama, while you sir couldn't even get past the starting line for your party's nomination and you seriously expect to be Vice President?"
"Senator, the only executive experience to which your man can point is his so called management of the 2,400 people who are working for his campaign. So far, his campaign's performance is so bad I wouldn't want him managing a seven eleven."
Let us have your best efforts in 'comments' and we'll update and bump the post as we go along.
8 minutes ago